Fourth Form of Madness

I started yoga teacher training at the beginning of this year as I felt I was ready to learn more about yoga. Over the years I have made two previous attempts at starting this but this time, everything just felt right. Which is funny because this year is turning out to be an absolute ripper of a year in terms of work commitments, life events and other study duties. In fact, of all the years, this should have been the year that I avoided taking on anything else. And yet here I am……truly loving it all and feeling supported by it rather than crushed from it. This approach towards life is a gift from yoga, I have no idea how it works but the more you practice the more it manifests and it is truly a blessing. I sometimes liken this approach to life like being in really big surf, there’s a little fear and lots of respect for the awesome power of this body of water you are in, out of this awareness you let’s it fluidity blend with your fluidity and you flow as one, the rhythm of your breath matching the rhythm of the tide, in and out, in and out, to the song of nature. So instead of trying to tame it (also known as struggling hee hee), it reclaims you with the softest of loving touches.

So I begin my journey of teacher training and to be fair there is a lot of “what the hell am I doing here” moments as with all new things that take you away from your comfort zone. My “what the hell?” moments are sparked by the fact that of all the places I could have selected to learn at this is probably the most hands on school. Great, but I’m not a hands on kind of gal (or so I think ;-)). And yet even though I am experiencing extreme discomfort at having to get into peoples space and adjust them, I’m still feeling this is exactly where I need to be . So I go with it, Life is one entity I’ve learnt not to disagree with, it’s too wise! At the same time, I am getting intensive”hug” therapy from my friend Jane, which is slowly melting down my resistance to touching.

And then it happens, the tables are turned and instead of being the one adjusting in a therapy class, I am actually participating in it, due to a sore lower back. How lucky was I as the experience transformed me! I always kind of thought of therapy yoga as a little bit intrusive as when you are going within all this touching would bring you back out. The key word in that sentence being “thought”. Once I experienced the class through my body I realised I couldn’t have been more wrong. It was so comforting to be adjusted by my fellow yoga trainees. Their gentle yet firm touches adjusting me into the shape I should take. I felt so supported and humbled by their loving service. All of me suddenly got therapy yoga and I rested back into it and let their hands support me.

Walking out of that class that night was like walking out into a brand new day! Nothing like a shift in mindset to make you feel renewed and light and airy. I drove home in a softened mind state that told me I was going to sleep well. And I couldn’t help notice that I was also looking forward to the next class that I got to adjust in. You never know what you are going to learn when you sign up for things, it’s all about staying open to learning and letting Life take you to places you need to be at to learn the things you need to learn. Whilst all the while trying not to struggle against it to much 🙂